Tuesday, April 30, 2013

A to Z Blogging Challenge: The "Z" Edition


Weight Loss Zingers for the Child of God

  • It’s going to take more time than you planned for or wanted it to.
  • If you weigh every day, be prepared for fluctuations and say no to discouragement.  Patience is vitally important.
  • You may possibly temporarily gain weight with exercise.
  • There will be days you don’t do everything “right.”
  • There will be days you don’t do anything “right.”
  • If you rely on your own strength, you will invariably struggle.
  • If you rely on God’s strength, you can pick up on Monday where you left off on Friday…after that weekend food-fest.   And He will help you to overcome those overdone weekends and/or nights.
  • God hears every prayer for freedom, but He requires you to believe that you have what He has already paid for with the blood of His son, our precious Jesus.
  • You will hit plateaus.
  • Some plateaus last a long time.   Again, patience.
  • You may need to give up sugar.  It certainly helped me.
  • You can do this…even if you need to lose 175 pounds.
  • You don’t have to wait until Monday to start.
  • You don’t have to wait until tomorrow to restart.


Monday, April 29, 2013

Dear Youth: What I wish I'd known....

If ever I were to speak to our youth today, I would say, “If you believe you are anything less than what God created you to be because of the way you look, your size, your grades, or your history (no matter what it is), then you are believing LIES straight from the pits of hell.  Any thoughts you have regarding yourself that make you believe you are different, and therefore less worthy, are not true, no matter what you have done or what has happened to you.

I would tell them that drugs will only exacerbate those feelings, and inhibit their decision-making abilities, and that decisions made under the influence are life altering. 

I would tell them that the drug to NOT start with is nicotine.

With tears in my eyes I would tell them that they are fearfully and wonderfully made; that God had a plan for them before time, and no matter what mistakes they may have already made, God still has a plan.   I would tell them about freedom, and how they don’t have to live their lives under the bondage of lies making them believe that they need drugs or alcohol or food to dull the pain, and that sex does not equal love. 

I would tell them that Jesus does, indeed, love them, just as they are, and He really does make a difference. 

Some wouldn’t listen.
Some would.

If you are reading this and feel unworthy of love,
I will tell you the very same thing.
And food can also be a drug…
But you can be a winner.
Christ loves you.  


Sunday, April 28, 2013

A to Z Blogging Challenge: The "X" Edition


Examining What I Believe…

If you read my last two posts (Here and Here), you know that I’ve spent a lifetime believing lies about myself simply because of my size.   Had I realized my value; that I was worth taking care of, my choices would have been much more careful and self-preserving.  

The truth is, personal value isn’t based on appearance.  You can know that in your heart, but argue it in your head, and believe that somehow you don’t quite measure up.   I know from personal experience.   But…all of my past mistakes have helped mold me into the person that I am today, and I am beginning to like this chick. 

So I got to thinking about choices and lies in my life now.

I was waiting to see freedom so that I could believe it, when in fact, I had to
believe it in order to see it.  Jesus died a horrific death in exchange for my freedom; He doesn’t give me freedom, He IS my freedom.  All those years I was begging him for freedom, I already had it.  The struggle was like trying to put on clothes I was already wearing.   I twisted and turned and struggled until all I got was my clothes on backwards…much like my thinking.

I don’t know why God put me on a path that started with low carb.   In His infinite wisdom, perhaps He just had mercy on my thick-headedness and allowed me to shed some weight so that I would lose some of the insulation (weight) that was affecting my heart hearing.

I mentioned that I’ve started walking again.  (I also mentioned that after I did, I gained weight.   That weight has again disappeared.)  During my walking time, God and I have some good conversations, and He sometimes gives me revelation.   Now you, Dear Reader, may see what I’m about to say as common sense, but I have often questioned the most simple of things…like how do I seek the Kingdom of God first?   God spoke to my heart while I was walking this past week, and He told me that it’s all about love.  If I love Him…truly, madly, deeply fall in love with Him, that I would naturally seek Him first.  Everything else will fall into place.

I’d like to say I now have it all figured out…that I have all the answers and I will share them with you.  But I don’t.  I’ll tell you what I do know, though.  If my brain is telling me that I want to eat 30 minutes after I ate my last meal, it’s a lie.  If my brain tells me I want to eat, eat, eat just because I ate something I like, such as ice cream, it’s a lie.  From now on, I refuse to believe blatant, obvious lies.   I can eat a cookie, two cookies, or no cookies.  Right now, I choose no cookies, but that doesn’t mean that someday, a cookie just might sound good to me, and I’ll have one.




Thursday, April 25, 2013

A to Z Blogging Challenge: The "V" Edition


A few years ago, I went to counseling to understand why I was doing the things I was doing, specifically, compulsive eating.  I went three different times, the first time, I quit.  The next two times, both counselors told me they didn’t know what else they could do to help me.   

I was so far into my pit that God Himself had to come after me and pull me out.  The fact is, He pulled me out more than once because I dove back in a time or two…eagerly and willing going back to the place that had been my emotional home all of my life.  I was deeply entrenched in self-loathing, so far in my pit, that being outside of its insulation was unfamiliar and uncomfortable. 

The lies about myself that satan dangled before me in my pre- and primary school years were so much a part of my life by my teens that it became part of my personality.  Because of my faulty thinking, while in junior high and high school, I was very susceptible to experimenting with “outside influences.”  Drugs.   I had already tried my first cigarette when I was in the fourth grade.  Later, I tried pot, pills and alcohol, but because of God’s abundant mercy, I never enjoyed them.  My drug of choice, always, was food.  Even though I wasn’t terribly overweight through high school, I already had the obsession for food.  Eating a dozen donuts or a whole pack of cookies…or a whole box of pop tarts was normal for me.   I learned to do it in secret, of course, to avoid the humiliation of others knowing what I was doing.  I would diet, lose weight, then start the whole process again.

When you don’t like yourself, it’s hard to believe that others like you, and everyone wants to be liked, to belong, especially a teenager.  Because of the self-loathing, the missing identity, the lies I believed that I was somehow unloveable, I made choices that altered the course of my life, including marrying a 29 year old man I barely knew who turned out to be very abusive.  When you add an abusive situation to an emotionally battered girl, you get someone who has no clue who they are, who can’t understand why they continue to make one bad choice after another.   After my divorce, I made some very, very bad choices.

Believing lies about who we are truly a vicious trap.  If we believe it, we’ll take care of destroying our lives with any further help from the devil. 

When I returned to Christ in my early 30’s, I brought my baggage with me, and I kept a death grip on the lies I believed, not letting God have them even for one minute.  My life was very hectic at that time.  I was working two jobs and I was helping raise three teenagers who liked to keep me on my toes.  By the time my life slowed back down to a normal pace, I was extremely overweight and extremely unhappy. 

It was at this time that I truly began to seek God for help in this area of my life.  But I was deeply entrenched in the lies I believed, and for 10 years, I tried it every way but God’s way.   

I obviously like talking about myself…I am already well over that blasted 500 words mark…so, I will continue tomorrow.  I didn’t even get to my V words…vindication and value!  And now I’ll have to come up with a W word to go with it…



Wednesday, April 24, 2013

A to Z Blogging Challenge: The "U" Edition


Proverbs 4
Get wisdom! Get understanding!
Do not forget, nor turn away from the words of my mouth.
Do not forsake her, and she will preserve you;

Love her, and she will keep you.
Wisdom is the principal thing;
Therefore get wisdom.
And in all your getting, get understanding.


  
I’ve always felt different because of my size.   When I was a young child, I was skinny and tall…taller than all the other kids my age.  Perhaps I looked older than my 5 or 6 years because of my height.   Before I was in the first grade, at my grandmother’s house, my uncle was giving my smaller cousins a “horsey ride” on his back.   When it came to what I thought was my turn, he told me he wouldn’t ride me because I was “bigger.”   At the time, I thought it was because I was taller, and I really don’t know why he did that…maybe he was tired, or he thought I was 7 or 8 instead of 4 or 5, but that’s the first clear memory I have of thinking I was unworthy or different because of my size.

In the first grade, my teacher was a tyrant.  My seat was practically right under her nose, and she was not nice to me.   An example of things that happened:  My classmate, Regina, dropped her pencil (those fat pencils that the school provided) and the lead broke.   My back was to the teacher’s desk (we sat at tables, 4 to a table) and I never saw what was coming.   Regina apparently told the teacher that I broke the lead, and the next thing I know, I was jerked up out of my seat and paddled, in front of everyone.  I had no clue what for!   Even if it had been my pencil, we had a pencil sharpener!  Another time, a classmate threw up right beside me, and she wouldn’t let me move.  I had to sit there until the janitor got it cleaned up.

I was afraid to tell my parents what was going on because that was the days of “if you get in trouble at school, you’ll get in trouble at home.”  But that treatment reinforced the lie I already believed:  I was treated that way because I was bigger (and wore cat-eye glasses to boot) than the other kids.  The belief of that lie has caused much grief in my life.

My “unworthiness” was not a conscious thought process.  I was not thinking, “I am treated this way because I am tall.”  No, it was something I just believed, but didn’t realize it until much later in life.  I can’t explain what that six year old Margaret was thinking.  (But I’ll have to add that I felt just as punished because my name was “Margaret” in addition to being tall, skinny, and wearing glasses.)

As I approached middle school age, I was still taller than most of my classmates, and I was getting a little chunky in addition to being “big boned.”  I never felt as if I belonged anywhere, I felt like I couldn’t do anything “good enough.”  Good enough for what, or for whom, I am not sure…but I certainly felt unworthy.  It was in these elementary years that I began my quest for satisfaction in the form of food…especially junk food.

If you are still with me…you’ve read almost 600 words.  Any good blogger knows you shouldn’t use more than 500 in an entry.

Tomorrow I’ll finish my history and tell you about vindication and my value.



Tuesday, April 23, 2013

A to Z Blogging Challenge: The "T" Edition

Being thankful when I’m thwarted…

I have days of being completely ungrateful, when I really have nothing to be ungrateful about!   I have made a decision to adopt an attitude of thankfulness.   I had actually spoken that thought out loud this weekend.

So what do you think happens?
I stepped on the scales this morning, and I’ve gained weight.

And I thought I deserved to see a loss!   Last week, I started walking again after not walking for two or so months…about a mile a day.   We went to Tuscaloosa for “A Day” and I did a lot of walking and stair climbing (with not a lot of overeating…but definitely some unhealthy eating).   Yesterday, I upped my mile to 1.5 miles.   Today, a weight gain. 

I really wanted to moan, groan, and carry on.
But I decided to thank God for every pound I’ve lost,
For every day I have walked in freedom…
And stay off the scales for a few days!

I shouldn't complain.  It has occurred to me that the longer it takes to come off, the less baggy-skinned I may be.  I can already see that I’m going to have to start working out my arms…getting a little saggy on the upper arm!  I know I won't be tight and toned like a 20 year old, but I don't want to be a deflated balloon, either.  And I’m noticing extra lines on my face that I didn’t use to see.   I’m sure pushing 50 has nothing to do with sags, bags and lines!

May 13 will be nine months walking in freedom.   I will post weight loss on that day…just in case you’re interested.


 

Monday, April 22, 2013

A to Z Blogging Challenge: The "S" Edition


Food Stamps and Such…

Food stamps and WIC are now called EBT (Electronic Benefit Transfer), and stamps and vouchers have been replaced by debit cards.   In an economy where food, gas and utility prices have skyrocketed, it can be difficult to not notice (and sometimes judge) the lady in front of you at the store using an EBT card.  

Sadly, America is in a mess, and Christians helped us get there leaving God out of the election process.  Unhappy taxpayers have taken to Facebook and forums to express their thoughts:    “Drug test welfare recipients!”   “Replace Congress…vote them all out!”   “Impeach Obama!”   People get very passionate in their comments and feel they have the answers…but unless they are including Jesus in that equation, they really don’t.

But I digress.

Do we want real change?   We should start with ourselves.   Then, we can go to the mission field called “the poor,” where second and third generation EBT users live who know no other life.   Take them Jesus!  Get your church van and go pick them up on Sundays and/or Wednesdays and take them to church.   No church van?   Find one or two children, talk to their parents, and take the children to church in your own car.   These are small steps toward the process of change.   Search and Rescue!   Head up a project to take the parents some Bibles and some “non-essentials” people like to have.  Sow some seeds!  That’s when real change will start.  Take them the Better Way.

Not happy with the current administration?  Stop complaining and start praying.  National Day of Prayer is May 2nd…join others at your local court house or other designated gathering place and pray…but don’t wait until the 2nd, and don’t stop on the 3rd.  Pray for our country!

And while I’m on my soapbox, let’s talk about that lady in the checkout line in front of you using her EBT card.  You notice that she’s got on nice clothes, and shoes, and with a raised eyebrow, you check out her cart to see some choice items that you didn’t dare toss in yours.  You think to yourself, “I bet your car is better than mine, too, and I’m working so that you can live a better life than me.  Get a job, why don’t you!”   She knows you’re looking at her, and she glances your way.   You offer a guilty half smile, but she’s seen that look before. 

Instead of nosing around in her cart, why not offer a short prayer for her blessing, her salvation, her situation.  You don’t know her heart, but God does.  She may be a sister in Christ who’s picking up food for a mother who is home with a sick child.   Or perhaps she’s wearing the best clothes she had (or borrowed) because she just left a job interview, only her third one in two months because no one is hiring.   When she glances your way, give her a whole smile.  Compliment her, and tell her that Jesus loves her. 

There will always be people who will take advantage of government programs…doesn’t that mean they need Jesus all the more?   We can’t punish every person receiving assistance because some are taking advantage of it.  We can’t save the world, and we don’t have to answer for the ones doing wrong.  As we come together to pray for a sinking nation, we can put those people in God’s hands while reaching out our own hands to help the ones we can, and pray for the ones we can’t.   



Sunday, April 21, 2013

A to Z Blogging Challenge...the "R" Edition

I'm sure, by now, you've seen the Dove Real Beauty Sketches...
I wonder how many of us don't realize that others see us as beautiful.  



Friday, April 19, 2013

A to Z Blogging Challenge: The Q Edition



I mentioned the other day that I'd like to start an Advice Column type of entry every now and then...so my Q entry is, of course....


Questions:

Anonymous asks, “What makes you think you’re qualified to give advice?”

Anyone can give an opinion to a question...even children come up with some of the best advice sometimes!  This is just something I’ve wanted to do for a while, so now I’m putting the idea out there…outside of my head.

Sometimes people like an objective point of view…an impartial opinion.  Qualifications?  Well, I have a Bachelor’s Degree in Sociology and Criminal Justice.  I also completed a couple of counseling classes:  CreationTherapy and Basic Theophostic…not that the classes qualified me for anything; they did, however, introduce me to some prayer and counseling concepts, and I have also gone through counseling myself with some wonderful Christian counselors.   We’ll see how it goes.  Folks may not want my advice…but some may. 





Question:  What do you do it you see a friend making a terrible mistake, but you know from experience that if you point out her error, she will quit speaking to you?

Based on your previous experience, you answered the question yourself:  Don’t say anything and pray.  (Sound advice that should be used more in today’s world!)  If her mistake is not putting her or someone else’s life in jeopardy, I would suggest just being there for her in a non-judgmental way if she decides to come to you when the mistakes is realized.  Keep in mind that she may never see her action as a mistake.  




In my last post, I said:  What if...eating carbs made me feel guilty, and that's why I want to eat more and more, and it has nothing to do with my physical being, but just my way of dealing with the pseudo guilt. 

And was asked, “What if is it NOT pseudo-guilt?”

If you mean that it’s real guilt, perhaps you overate…a lot (as it was often in my case), you ask forgiveness, and almost as importantly, you forgive yourself, you pick yourself up, dust off, and go on.

If you are asking what if the cravings aren’t pseudo guilt-related, I suppose we are back to Square One…limiting those carbs! 

For me (I have no additional health factors such diabetes or gluten allergies), I have just about decided that I have been believing a lie that my freedom is limited.  I have more praying and thinking to do, but this is really making sense to me!  Getting rid of strongholds and a wrong belief system, a renewed mind and reaping the fruits of the spirit (which include self-control) sounds really good to me at this stage in my life. 

I have a lot more to write about this topic, and I will be posting about it in the coming weeks.  Some very interesting thoughts….


For more A to Z entries, clicky:

Thursday, April 18, 2013

A to Z Challenge: The "P" Edition

Physical Vs. Spiritual

What if...eating carbs made me feel guilty, and that's why I want to eat more and more, and it has nothing to do with my physical being, but just my way of dealing with the pseudo guilt.

 I'm going to give this some extra thought.




Wednesday, April 17, 2013

A to Z Blogging Challenge: The "O" Edition

Oh, Oh!


It Occurs To Me That... 
  • I am too impatient with stupidity.
  • When I call other drivers “idiot” alone in my car, I may be putting myself in danger of the council, because the best I can tell, the definition of “Raca” is idiot.   
  • I am not really sure what “danger of the council” means.
  • If we elected Godly leaders, our economy would be budding.
  • Statements like the above make ungodly people mad.
  • I enjoy, too much, making right comments in a leftist media.
  • They don’t like that...but the Truth does hurt, doesn't it?
  • My attitude needs some work.  
  • Christians are a real minority these days.
  • There will come a day when we will not be a minority.
  • I would like to start an "Advice Column Day" in this blog.    I just may do it!  I just need some folks to ask me for some advice…
  • We are over half way through this A to Z Challenge! 



Tuesday, April 16, 2013

A to Z Blogging Challenge: The "N" Edition

North Alabama...The Shoals and Nearby


Rock Pile - TVA Reservation - The Shoals

I love to walk the trails on TVA!  Now that I've lost some weight,
I am planning a Spring and Summer of much more movement!
  
Cane Creek Canyon - The Shoals

If you live in the Shoals...or nearby, Cane Creek Canyon is worth the drive!  You can hike as far as you like...or not so far, if you'd rather.  

We certainly have heat.   But any Southerner knows it’s not really the heat, it’s the humidity, which is so bad there are days you feel you are breathing hot water!  At times, we are thought to be less intelligent because of our slower speech and southern accent.   It’s true that some folks in Alabama do talk funny…but that’s because they once lived in the North.   For the most part, we don’t hold it against them, though we do think some of the things they do peculiar.   For instance, they don’t wave at every car they pass on old country roads.  We southerners know it’s not only polite, but expected, that you throw up a hand or at least an index finger as you pass a car or a folks sitting out on their porches when you are in the country.

.

UNA Flowers - The Shoals


In the Beautiful Shoals, where I am blessed to live, we have lakes and rivers, streams and creeks, where we gather for picnics, bass tournaments and family outings.  In these same waters, we ski, sail, ride the waves on jet skis and wave runners, and bait the waters for trout or catfish, which we fry and eat!   We have farms and old barns, and green leafy fields dotted with white cotton or yellow corn silk.   You will see tall, green trees, bright flowers and colorful birds.   Our beautiful skies are dotted with clouds that look like puffy, white bits of cotton stretching across a blue expanse making a comforting and pleasing contrast.    We have pink, purple and orange sunsets that are so brilliant, at times one feels the need to just stop and breathe in the wonder of God’s artistic masterpiece.  

Sea Gull
The Birds of Deibert Park - The Shoals
Green Heron


We have rain, and lots of it at times!   Our Augusts epitomize the dog days of summer, but afterwards, we are dazzled with a brilliant array of reds, golds, and bright yellows of fall!   

Snow sometimes comes, usually only for a day or two, but it blankets us in stark white, glistening beauty when it makes its rare appearance. 

UNA Snow - The Shoals

Frozen Falls - Rock Pile - The Shoals

Natchez Trace, Colbert Park, - The Shoals


Our celebrations include the Arts Alive Festival in the spring, the Spirit of Freedom fireworks that light up our skies in July; WC Handy and Helen Keller Festivals (both Handy and Keller were born in the Shoals), the Renaissance Faire and Oktoberfest in October.   We have Founder’s Day parades and picnics, car shows and inviting parks!   Florence is the home of the beautiful campus of the University of North Alabama and Lions football.   We are the Bible Belt, our avenues are lined with churches of every denomination, all of which are friendly and helpful.    We are the places, the celebrations, the people!  We are Alabama the Beautiful, and we are blessed beyond words.

 Beaver Dam, Nature Trail on Natchez Trace Parkway
Near Colbert Park
Nature Trail on Natchez Trace Parkway
Near Colbert Park
 

Monday, April 15, 2013

A to Z Blogging Challenge: The "M" Edition

M?
It's all about ME!
Margaret
The name means "Pearl."
 
A location:   Margaret, Alabama (population 1,169)
A Movie:  Margaret
A Saint:   The patron of expectant mothers
Queens of Scotland and Denmark
A Hungarian Princess
An Author:   Margaret Mitchell wrote Gone With the Wind
A baby:   Margaret Laura (Mila) former President Bush's first granddaughter.
 

Sunday, April 14, 2013

A to Z Blogging Challenge: The K-L Edition

I missed a day!   Then...I missed another!  Thankfully, Sunday is a catch up day, so I am back on track.  (Actually, it's supposed to be a day "off," but I'm a little off most days I had to use it to make up for the days I lollygagged around and didn't post.)


Word of the Day:
klatsch
[klahch, klach]
noun
a casual gathering of people, especially for refreshments and informal conversation; chitchat, gossip


"I work with a klatsch who sometimes like to klatsch." <<< don't tell them I said that...and I'm not saying which of them klatsch.  :::snicker:::: 

K-L Margaretisms. 

  • A little knowledge is not enough, but it's all I can muster up some days.
  • I put a pair of flip flops on the other day.  My toes are so long I scared myself.  So, I gave a brand new pair away.  
  • My grandmother always had a lot knick knacks around her house.   I still have her little porcelain commode, which is probably older than me.  I now wonder why, of all the things I could have chosen, I chose a 4 inch toilet.
  • When I was four or five, I got lost from my mother in a retail store.   It scared me so badly, I still keep up with where she is.


Wednesday, April 10, 2013

A to Z Blogging Challenge: The "I" Edition

Inability
Being discouraged by my own inability to change is not trusting in Him to make me whole.  There are times when I’m struggling so hard, and all He wants me to do is trust in Him.  It’s like a like a baby fighting sleep.

As children of God, we are supposed to be obedient.   He tells us to roll our cares on Him, but so often we trust in our own strength because we think we can do something (or that we have to do something) to accomplish freedom, but the truth is, He is our freedom; He doesn’t give it to us, He IS.    But when we get the “I gotta do” attitude, we start to rely on our own ability.  I don’t know about you, but I’ve proven “my own ability” is actually “my inability.” 
Some trust in chariots, and some in horses; But we will remember the name of the Lord our God.  They have bowed down and fallen; But we have risen and stand upright.   Psalm 20:7-8 
I want my desire to be obedient and Christ-like to outweigh my desire to lose weight.  My desires are not always right, though!  But, if I am doing my part (not giving into gluttony…not even a little bit) the desired weight loss will naturally follow.  He doesn’t leave us alone in our battle to be obedient.  (It can be a battle, can’t it?)  He has shown me that by staying off sugar, it’s much easier for me to not be gluttonous.

May He grant you according to your heart's desire
And fulfill all your purpose.
We will rejoice in your salvation,

And in the name of our God we will set up our banners!
May the
 Lord fulfill all your petitions.
Psalm 20:4-5
 

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

A to Z Blogging Challenge: The "H" Edition

 photo GodWhispers1_zpsc9fde6ce.jpg(From my handwritten journal in my alone times with God)
Put on the breastplate of righteousness, because the one Holy God is our righteousness.   We should wear Him like a comforter that covers us and keeps us warm, because He is, indeed, our Comforter.  Grasp the Horn of Salvation and hold fast.  He hears our pleas every time we call out to Him!  When we renew our minds, we strengthen our souls, and we can only renew our minds by being daily in His Word. 
 photo 2013AtoZ-H_zpscfd51d94.jpg




The second Gomer mentioned in the Bible (yesterday's G post mentioned the first Gomer):

Gomer was also the wife of the prophet Hosea, and she was a harlot.





 photo 2013AtoZ-BlueHerons_zps3815a10d.jpg 
Herons, Herons, Herons...and a snowy egret.
 photo 2013AtoZ-Herons_zpse8d05c79.jpg 
Great Blue Herons
 
 photo 2013AtoZHyacinth2_zps61bcc5a9.jpg 
Hyacinth McCaws (Nashville Zoo)
I love these beautiful birds!
 photo 2013AtoZHyacinth_zps3feb6c54.jpg 
 
 photo 2013AtoZ-Henbit_zpsadd6dfe2.jpg  
  Who knew this weed that covers my 
yard every spring had a name?   Henbit.  
 
  photo 2013AtoZ-Helocopter_zpse9a05ef4.jpg 
  Ole Boy and I went to Wheeler Dam on Sunday. 
I was a little disappointed that I didn't get very many "H" opportunities, 
when suddenly, this helicopther flew overhead.
 

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