Monday Musings: The Spring Edition

Purple Cherry Blossom

 Dear God:

Spring is almost here, and You’re giving us a magnificent preview!   The Bradford pears are beautiful; the purple cherry blossoms and Japanese maple blooms are gorgeous!   Purple clover is carpeting the ever-greening grass, and the Dogwood buds are peeking out, too.    I just wanted to say thank You.

Dogwood Bloom, UNA

Dear Spring:

I’m looking forward to enjoying you!   A new beginning for the earth, and for me, too!   I can’t wait to grab my camera and get some shots of all the blooms and buds.

Dear Storms:

I know you must be a necessary event, but I hope you stay on the mild side all season.

Dear UNA:

I’m very grateful.   I love my job environment.   I’m truly blessed to be a part of such a pretty campus.   (Again, thank You, Lord.)

 Japanese Maple Blossoms, North Florence

Dear Monday:

I don’t mind you being damp and dreary…I’d much rather it be this way on Monday than on Saturday or Sunday.

Dear Spring Break:
I.  Can’t.  Wait!

Dear Thoughts:

I think I need to work on making sure you stay positive…the renewal of springtime is the perfect time for a renewal of the mind!

Dear Words:

♫Oh, be careful little mouth what you say♪…words are powerful, and I’ll give an account for idle words.   I am trying to be more conscientious about what I say, and that starts with what I’m thinking.   Ohhhh, Words!   You are so hard to contain!

I'll be changing my motif soon...so when you visit, my little cyberspace may look different, and it may be different more than one time before I'm finished.  

Seven Months In...

    (Well....79.8 to be exact.   Close enough, don't you think?)   

I think one of the key factors in my success thus far, other than Christ, of course, is my attitude.  I am not stressing over every calorie, fat gram or carb that goes into my mouth.   I stay away from cookies, cake and candy (though I do have sugar free treats).   

I read blogs where people are meticulous about every morsel that goes into their mouths, and just as conscientious about weighing each day, and each pound they gain sends them into a frenzy.  They analyze and get depressed...and remember all the hard work and the things they were deprived of...and want to eat even more.  I used to be this way...and every time I made "wrong" choices, it usually began the demise of everything I'd struggled to accomplish.   (And every pound was usually a struggle.)  

Wouldn't you agree that's not freedom?

During my journey, I have fluctuated.   I have had "bad food" days and even "bad" weekends (never sugar-laden, but certainly carby), and I've gained some pounds here and there...but it was always temporary.  I never lost sight of the fact that I am free; though there are times I have to remind myself that I am free, and free indeed.   When I eat too many carbs, I end up just wanting to eat.  Those are the times when I have to tell myself that I don't have to keep eating, and those days are the only days when I have to fight the thoughts that "...maybe I'm not really free..."   That's why I choose to not eat sugar, I can certainly have a cookie, and at this point, I believe I could eat only one or only two, but I think I may have cravings later, and the taste of a cookie isn't worth the cravings, nor do I want to spend carbs on cookies.   That's what works for me...a few cookies and no pizza may be what works for you.

Do you talk to yourself?   Out loud?   You should!   Words are powerful.  When I struggle to believe the TRUTH, such as "I am free," because what I really want to do is eat, I say it out loud.  "I AM FREE!"   And if I don't believe myself, I say it again.   I quote the scriptures that I have tucked away in my heart about freedom.   We prevail...Christ and I...and I continue on my freedom journey, with Him at my side, (or sometimes leading me).  

Please do not think that I think I have all the answers.   I sure don't (But He does).  And I am in no way being judgmental toward anyone else's journey and how they are choosing to lose weight, nor am I being negative towards those who are struggling.  I'm only telling you my experience; that I keep believing I am free, and I keep walking in freedom.   When I have pizza or bread, I do not stress about it and think "I've blown it, I may as well eat a pack of cookies, too."  What I do is eat a slice or two of pizza, or eat a Subway sandwich, and I go on about my day.

I try to not eat when I'm not hungry, but sometimes I do.  It's a lot easier to stop when I'm full when I'm not full of sugar.  (I'm still working on slowing down!)

I'm not exercising very much, nor very regularly.

I am not counting carbs, nor calories...I'm only counting the pounds lost.

I am not obsessing about what I eat or don't eat.

I do not rely on my own strength.   (That's the big one.)

And I believe.   You really should remove the "I can't" from your vocabulary.  No more:

• I can't do this.
• I can't eat only a little of that.
• I can't lose weight.
• I can't. 

• You can do this.
• You can choose to eat only a little or none at all, but the choice is yours.
• You can lose weight (or do whatever you need to do.)
• You can.

Coming Soon:   Have you ever heard of the Weight Watcher's Core Plan?   Are you unsure what's the best plan of action for you?  I've done a little research I'll share with you.  

Monday Musings: The Shopping Edition

Dear Old Clothes:

I’m thankful for you, truly I am.   But some of you have to go NOW.   Others of you will have to go shortly…but I’m going to let you stick around a little longer.

Dear New Clothes:

I’m getting a little excited about you!  I’m actually paying a little more attention to what I’m buying…meaning, I don’t have to buy you just because you fit!

Dear Shopping Cart:

I no longer feel I simply must have you in order to shop…which was one of the myriad of reasons I rarely visited malls.

Dear Mall:

You no longer daunt me!   I actually have visited three different establishments of your ilk in the past month, and I survived!  I not only survived, I thrived!   Well, “thrived” is pushing it just a little.

Dear Prices:

Good Grief!!   You really want me to pay THAT much for a piece of cloth?   You don’t even look like you’re put together that well.   I wonder how many washes you’d hold together through?

Dear Money:

I think I’m going to have to save you a while to be able to afford new clothes when I simply have nothing else I can get by with wearing.

Dear Seven Months Anniversary:

You will be here Wednesday.   I wonder what number you will show me on the scales?  Right now you are fluctuating and hovering around 80 pounds lost.   I hope to see 80 on Wednesday…or more, even.

Dear Hope:

It’s really nice to have you back in my life.   I can’t really remember the last time we visited.   You’ve added a little excitement to my days.  I think I’m going to allow you to move in and become a permanent part of my life.

Friday Fiver

 The Friday Fiver is a blast from the past from the AOL Journal days

I still miss that old blogging community called J-Land.

Five Things I Didn't Say

But perhaps should have...

♦There are certain things to which nobody should be subjected, and I feel like you just subjected me to one of them.

♦Your skirt is just too short.   Following you up the stairs was kinda scary.

♦YOU want to complain about the distractions in here?!

♦Yes!  Yes, indeed, your butt does look bigger in that outfit.  You actually put the "out" in fit this time.  (What?   You didn't ask me?  Maybe you should have.   What?   Oh.  No, I didn't consider my own backside.)

♦You've been standing in my doorway talking for an hour, and I still don't know what you mean!

Nashville Part 2; Thoughts on Freedom

On the way home from Nashville, we stopped at Fall Hollow Waterfalls.   I fully understand the name "Fall Hollow."   It was a little rougher terrain than I remembered.   "Unimproved" includes mud, overgrown roots, and steep hills. The path down.   It was a lot steeper than it looks.
This was the better looking part of the path.
Rooty Roots!


Small falls
The larger falls.   I don't think I could have made it down the path to get better  shots.   Very pretty, though!   I've made the trip down before,  a long time ago, but I am certain the path was not as treacherous.

When I first started planning my long weekend in Nashville, I made a mental note of the restaurants I wanted to visit.  One of those choices was the Loveless Café for breakfast.   Biscuits and jam!  Yes, I ate it, and no, it wasn’t low carb, but it sure was good!  I also ordered this omelette:     

I only ate half.  Definitely low carb.

I was working the puzzles while I waited for my food.     

I also went to my favorite catfish place, Cock of the Walk...I love that place.

There are some life-long habits I need to break.  One is eating too fast, but I usually forget to work on that until I've already gobbled my food.   Then I think, "I could have enjoyed that a little more."  But the big thing I find myself reverting back to is guilt...or a better term I learned in counseling: "pseudo guilt."    

Eating biscuits with jam and fried catfish isn’t a sin; overeating (anything) is.  That’s when I get into gluttony.  Gluttony is a choice, just like choosing to eat a biscuit for breakfast, or breaded foods for dinner.  So, just because I ate a little jam on two small biscuits, my brain wanted to tell me "You've blown it now."   I've learned to recognize these lies, and I now can put II Corinthians 10:5 to work in my thought process and cast down those arguments, and all the thoughts that try to exalt themselves against the knowledge of my God given Freedom, and bring those thoughts into captivity to the obedience of Christ.

(By the way, I can't "blow it" because I am not on a diet.  I have simply cut out all cookies, cake, and candy, the former mainstay of my diet, and strictly limited other carbs such as bread and jam.)

There are certain items I can’t eat without knowing that I am going to face cravings later on.  A little bit of jam on a biscuit this past weekend didn't set my cravings in motion.   For some reason, though, Mexican food does make me want to eat for no reason...

Let me state emphatically that cravings from Mexican food are not nearly as strong as the uncontrollable cravings I used to get while sugar was still a staple of my regular food intake.  Sugar cravings are much more intense, and much harder to withstand.  In fact, I never could manage to withstand them.  Cutting   sugar out makes a huge difference.  (Said after I ate jam this past weekend...)

Later in the evening after a Mexican dinner, when I want to eat when I am not hungry, being able to recognize it for what it is, I am able to stay strong and not keep eating.  

For sure, I’m no expert on this low-carb thing.  It's a learning process, and I am learning as I go.   I know for sure it's LOW carb, not no carb.   :::big smile:::  If I ever figure it all out, I'll be sure to share the info with you.  For now, I just don't want to appear like I'm talking in circles.  

To confuse you (me) even more about my sugar cravings, let me tell you about what I did in early January.  I rarely EVER drink soda, diet or otherwise, but I drank a full leaded Sprite by accident  (I thought it was a Sprite Zero...don't ask how I could do that...I don't know!!), but I didn’t realize it until the next day.  I didn't have any any crazy cravings.  It made me wonder if it’s all in my head, but then I remembered day after day after day of binge eating, a seemingly uncontrollable "need" to eat before I started low carb.  So I know the cravings are definitely real...but I have no answer for why the Sprite didn't bother me, because sometimes I unintentionally eat something with sugar and don’t realize it until later when the cravings hit, and I go back over what I've eaten and have an "Aha!" moment.  

I have already learned that the lower the carbs, the better the weight loss.  (I have also learned that I don’t like plateaus, but I thank God for them anyway, because I feel there must be a reason our bodies refuse to let go of pounds at times.)  I have also recognized that I probably won't ever be one of those people who will never eat bread or pizza again.   However, I have found it’s a lot easier to not overeat when I when I don’t eat those things.  Again, it comes down to choices.

By the way, after the semi-carby weekend, I think my plateau is finally over.  I am 74 pounds down.   

One last thought to share with you:  Freedom is real.   You can have it, too.  If ever I doubt that it's real, I only need to wake up the morning after a bad food choice (such as, for example, a fried catfish dinner) and be able to go right along as though I ate broccoli and broiled fish the night before.  Please never doubt that, indeed, you can be free from the shackles that bind you.

My Weekend In Photos

For my long birthday weekend, Ole Boy and I went to Nashville.      Isn't this a pretty view of the skyline?   I needed to straighten this shot, didn't I?
I had to do some climbing to get to this view. I'm looking down (catching my breath)   And then I had to do more climbing.  And still the climb wasn't over! to get to the Shelby Street Pedestrian Bridge  I got some great shots, but you'll just have to wait until April  during the A to Z challenge to see them. (I know you're excited!)
 This is at the Bass Pro Shop at Opry Mills Mall We did a lot of walking at the mall!  

Flowers at the Opryland Hotel

The Nashville Flea Market The chandelier at our hotel.  It was five stories high. Almost looks like water, doesn't it?  
Isn't this chair ugly?   It's so ugly I didn't sit in it!   But the truly great thing is that I didn't sit in any chairs, And I walked all the way around the mall. It's a really big mall. (We walked another mall, too, the Cool Springs Galleria) There were also benches along the Pedestrian bridge,  and I didn't sit, not one time! 
 
There were lots of great aromas in the mall,  but I didn't fall for these tricks!    The funny thing about Sweet CeCe's  (to me, anyway) is that back in 2009,  I named my eating issue CeCe, Compulsive Eating Compulson Epic

  And sugar didn't win.   I did.

On this trip, we were a lot more active than in recent years!   I think I was more excited about all that I was doing than I was about the trip itself.  (I don't know if that's sad or not.)  In years past, I just had no energy to drag myself around a mall, much less TWO of them!   And you can rest assured, I did more sitting than I did walking.   Not this time!  No sitting, all walking.   We walked at the Flea Market, which included a big hill, more walking at the malls, hills on the bridge (again, no sitting!) and a trip through the Opryland Hotel, and I had to walk from the mall parking lot to get to the hotel.   

It's been a long time since I really visited a mall, other than running in and out of only one or two stores.   I didn't realize they've turned the mall into a fair midway of people trying to grab you and suck the life out of you get your money.  Their favorite pick up line was "Can I ask you a question?"   Folks wanted to know if I washed my  hands a lot.   ??!   Or did I clean my face?   Or "Hey, let me give you something!"   Yeah, right.

I did fall for one of those "deals."  It cost me $200.  No lie.  However...I'm quite happy about that one.

Come Sunday, I was pretty tired.   But that didn't stop us from stopping and taking a short side trip along the Natchez Trace to see some waterfalls.   Only...The path was pretty steep and wet, so I didn't go all the way down.   I will try to post pics of that tomorrow...but I didn't get a lot of good shots.

Speaking of tomorrow (or the next day), we'll talk about all those wonderful Nashville restaurants.... 

Believing When the Scales Slow Down

As I mentioned the other post day, I started dread-milling last week.   One reason I decided to start a little exercise regimen is because the scales aren’t moving.  Since late January, the scales have only fluctuated between 70-72 pounds lost.  This morning, it was 72.4 pounds, and that’s after 5 days of exercise.  I wish I could say that my attitude has been perfect through this whole plateau, but I’m sure you are smart enough to recognize a lie.   It can be flustrating (a cross between being flustered and frustrated) to step on the scales day after day, and weigh the same.

So what’s a believer to do?

For me, when it gets to the point that I forget to be thankful for freedom; when the number on the scales become more important than just being grateful that I am no longer in the cycle of binge/guilt/binge/loathing myself, it’s time to stop weighing for a while. 

This morning, I noticed a piece of Russell Stover sugar free coconut chocolate candy on my kitchen counter.  Then I remembered, I set that out to eat last night, but forgot.   I put two pieces out last night, ate one…but completely forgot the other one.   That, my friend, is something that has never happened in my life!   So, for me to define myself by a number on the scale is completely ridiculous!   I forgot a piece of candy…chocolate coconut candy!   The fact that I only got out two was a miracle in itself, but to only eat one?   I am free!   No matter how little the scales move. 

Saturday, I was scrounging around in the garage looking for some clothes to wear, because my clothes are too big these days (and I refuse to buy any right now).   As I was piddling around, I happened to put my hand on my hips, and I felt something.   I would have freaked out thinking I had a knot or something, except that it was on both sides.   I called over to Ole Boy, “Come here and feel of this!  What is it?”   He came and pushed around a little, and said, “That’s your bone!” 

:::Oh:::

It’s been a while since I’ve felt that.

I’ve felt of it a few times since Saturday.

Plateaus are a part of losing weight.   I am not above hitting one.   I didn’t want to hit one, but I’m no different than anyone else.  I refuse to give into the “flustration” of defining myself or my God-given freedom because of the number on a scale.  You, Believer, are a child of God, a joint heir with Christ.   Jesus laid down his life for our freedom, and just as we believe for our salvation, believe for your freedom.   My friend, it doesn’t matter what chains you are struggling with, He is your freedom.   

If you are bothered by the numbers, stop looking at them!   You know in your knower if you are doing “everything right” just as you know if you’re fudging a little.  If you’re doing everything right, then be patient.  There must be a reason that God gives us plateaus.   Keep believing.